I hope this post finds you well. Before I get into day nine, I must say that today is actually day ten, but as I don’t feel able to do today’s prompt, I’m not going to write about it. However, today Alana asked us to really consider what we eat, and whether we want to eat it, so that we can listen to our bodies a little more easily. In theory, this might be a useful exercise. For me right now, it’s not the most practical thing.
I’m aware that food is often (too often) a source of comfort for me, but right now, it’s my ultimate source of discomfort. Went to the dentist on Friday to find out that my wisdom teeth are working their way through. That is deeply painful at times, although whoever invented paracetamol is a saint in my book at the moment.
Yesterday’s exercise was far more productive, as Alana challenged us to try sitting with some of the big feelings that we would usually muscle through. Don’t mind admitting that reading that prompt nearly made me cry, although I wasn’t in a ‘safe place’ to let go.
I realised that given the opportunity, most of my ‘big’ feelings will rush to the surface, which isn’t helpful. It gives me a chance to let them go, but the process of doing so is something like a fur-ball, in that I think I’ve dealt with it, and then I haven’t.
It’s incredible, really. Shine is showing me a side of my personality that I thought I’d completely lost in the midst of my grief. I’m getting closer than ever to finding that place of peace within myself that is eternal and unshakeable.
There’s a lot more that I need to work on, I know…but as I said at the beginning: ‘I think separating the real me from the bereaved me is enough for the next 28 days.’
If you’re interested in following my progress with Shine as I post, please follow the blog via email (on the right) to make sure that you don’t miss an update over the next 28 days.
Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,