I hope this post finds you well. Traditionally (i.e. since 2010) February has been an easier month for me, due to the distraction provided by February Album Writing Month or “FAWM”. This year, I seem to be writing the album I could not have written two years ago in the midst of my fresh grief for Kim. I have a little perspective, and although it’s perhaps not the happiest music in the world, it is enjoyable to be writing again.
I love being able to play guitar, write lyrics and express myself that way. It doesn’t happen often enough in the ‘off-season’, between March and July. Although I’m trying to make it so.
More recently I have written more poetry, and that is what I intend to share today. This poem was inspired in part by trying to expedite the process of dealing with some of the emotion I have not yet processed. I put ‘Go Rest High On That Mountain’ on in the background, and rather than the reaction I expected, this poem came forth.
I continue to take small steps towards the claim I make in the closing lines, but I am more certain now that it will happen one day.
At the Edge of Sadness
I stand at the edge of sadness
Afraid to dive in, at the same time
I am afraid to walk away.
It has taken most of my strength
To turn and face this once again.
In the same moment,
I wonder what will happen.
There are two paths,
Either I walk into it,
Or run away again.
There is really only one choice.
If I run from it now,
I will not face it again
With the same resolve
And bravery born of knowing
That I do not make the step alone.
This is a different grief
The like of which I have not known
So many questions remain
I must accept what I know:
That I will not know
I cannot know another’s soul
My own reminds me that I
Have a duty to myself
To keep on the path.
The path I am on
Is unlike any other
I know only where I hope it leads
Whatever it takes, I want to forgive.
Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,