This year seems to be a year of revelations for me. Just lately I have realised yet again how very lucky I am to have known Chris, and had the opportunity to share parts of my life with her.
I know that the events could have happened in any number of other ways, but they didn’t…and as difficult as it undoubtedly was, and is to cope with the loss of Chris, I am grateful for every moment we shared, and those teaching moments that still seem to happen now and then.
Each one of those, and every white feather I see, prompts me to stop and give thanks for a friendship that should have lasted a lifetime, and will…it’s just that one of us isn’t around in the usual sense. I’ve begun to enjoy telling people about Chris, and looking at the expressions on their faces. Luckily, most of the people I have met and spoken to about the nature of our friendship have been understanding.
The fact that I can finally share the story and not feel as though I need to lie down in a dark room for two days afterwards is surely progress. As I’ve written before, I firmly believe that sharing the story of our online friendships, and the conventional or unconventional beginnings is one way in which our friends live on through us.
I smile to myself as I tell Chris’ story, and recognise all of the little ways in which she influenced my life. It has all come to one thing – I am a better person because of her influence. I realise that more now than ever, because I have finally emerged from the impossible, impenetrable cave of grief. I have stopped being a spectator in my life, and now seek to help others by sharing the experiences I have on my journey with this unusual experience of loss.
I’d love to know how your online friendships began, or about any memorable moments. If you’re comfortable, please feel free to share in the comments.
Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,
PS: Because this post is ‘late’, the next post will be on Sunday.