NaBloPoMo: Detachment


Lately, I’ve been thinking about Kim again in earnest. Unfortunately, it’s not yet become the positive thinking that I would be able to tolerate. (I don’t yearn for it in the same way as I do for positive thinking about Chris) I’ve written before of the ‘slow process of letting go’, which I will continue to engage in, but I really think that I need to detach from the experience. It’s not going to serve me any longer. Without further ado, here’s the poem I just wrote to clarify and crystallise my feelings on this most difficult of subjects. I’m well aware that this is only one moment, and my feelings may well change.

Detachment

Is detachment the only answer?
Must I resolve myself to being uncharitable?
It’s not that I don’t care, maybe I care too much?

The world would still turn
If I allowed myself my freedom
There is no way, but to make my choice

Choosing freedom does not mean
I do not care about her, about them
It means that I am ready to care for myself.

I cannot carry what does not serve me
This is a prime example, of course.
I lose nothing more, by letting this go
And gain a clearer picture
Of my place and purpose

___________________

This blog is yet another way in which I attempt to gain a clearer picture.

Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,

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About Casey Bottono

I am in love with language. I write poetry and fiction in a wide variety of genres. Most recently, I have been shortlisted as a finalist in the Coalition of Texans with Disabilities' Pen2Paper contest.
This entry was posted in anorexia, coping-with-grief, cyberloss, Grief Loss and Bereavement, Kim. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to NaBloPoMo: Detachment

  1. I am visiting from ICLW – I find my blog helps me get a clearer picture too

  2. Mali says:

    Here from ICLW. You have it exactly right with these words:

    “Choosing freedom does not mean
    I do not care about her, about them
    It means that I am ready to care for myself”

    Managing to believe that is, I think, I huge step forward.

I love it when you share your thoughts- so feel free.

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