NaBloPoMo – ‘One Sided Conversation’


I no longer know exactly when, because my memory plays tricks on me with these things, but about eight months before Chris died, we actually discussed talking via webcam/microphone. It never happened, because we ran out of time…but today’s NaBloPoMo poem hopefully represents some of the things I might have said.

One Sided Conversation

I wonder if I’d have laughed or cried
Said the things I held inside
Said the things I’d been dreaming of
Let you know how much you were loved.

I might have asked about the kids
Come to that, I sometimes did
But how I wish I’d had the choice
To hear you talk, and hear your voice

It’s one thing among those I dream of now
I don’t know why, and I don’t know how
There must be some reason, or at least a rhyme
To tell me why we ran out of time.

But I love you still
And I want you to know
I carry you with me
Wherever I go

Of all my friends, you’ve taught me most
About how to handle what is lost
I needn’t lament what is ‘gone’
But I take your lessons, and carry on.

_________

How I wish I’d had the chance to have that conversation…but it feels good to get some of that stuff out. Please feel free to leave a comment if you’re so inclined.

Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,

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PS: My brain really does play tricks on me- I’ve just checked, and it was more like eight months before she passed.

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About Casey Bottono

I am in love with language. I write poetry and fiction in a wide variety of genres. Most recently, I have been shortlisted as a finalist in the Coalition of Texans with Disabilities' Pen2Paper contest.
This entry was posted in anniversaries, Chris, Grief Loss and Bereavement, NaBloPoMo, poetry and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to NaBloPoMo – ‘One Sided Conversation’

  1. Rae says:

    This poem is beautiful. I am so sorry for your loss, but know that your words are pure, from the heart, and hope that you saying them now brings you some solace.

I love it when you share your thoughts- so feel free.

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