Grief and New Year’s Resolutions (2012 version)

There seems to be some demand for another New Year’s resolutions post- so here it is!

If you have recently experienced the loss of an online friend (or even not so recently) New Year’s resolutions may not be a topic which is high on your list of priorities, but there are ways to think about them which can be useful to us as we grieve our personal ‘unorthodox’ losses.

You can choose how to view your grief: do you want it to define you and become an attribute, or do you want it to shape you into the person you will become, thanks in part to your contact with your friends? Have a think about that and we will come back to it later. If you have milestones coming up in 2012, make sure that you have some idea of how you are going to handle them.  (I can talk,  I only have half an idea about one of four, but it will be more bearable because of that.)

Resolutions are tricky things at the best of times, so if this article has you twitchy, please don’t worry. Sometimes the best resolution we can make is to do our best to be the person we really want to be, wounded warriors, warts and all. I urge you to make the most simple resolution of all – ‘I will do my best’, and that is one you can never break. Resolve to help yourself by allowing yourself to feel your emotions to the maximum level with which you are comfortable – it will make the dark days fewer in the long run. Above all, remember that you have as much right to grieve an online loss as any other. Your friend is a significant part of who you are, maybe not in your physical make up, but there is bound to be a part of you which is also a part of them, wherever you believe them to be.

I wish you all the best in finding your path through your grief. May 2012 bring hope and peace to us all.


About Casey Bottono

I am in love with language. I write poetry and fiction in a wide variety of genres. Most recently, I have been shortlisted as a finalist in the Coalition of Texans with Disabilities' Pen2Paper contest.
This entry was posted in Chris, coping-with-grief, Kim, New Year, online loss issues, support and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Grief and New Year’s Resolutions (2012 version)

  1. Bill Howdle says:

    After reading the comment you left fo me over on my site, I just had to pop over for a visit and am very glad I did. What you are doing here is wonderful and I will be back to check it out in more detail. Hope you don’t mind I am adding you to my blogroll.

I love it when you share your thoughts- so feel free.

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