I hope this post finds you well. As this is the time of year people begin to search for information on making New Year’s Resolutions whilst grieving, I am continuing what seems to have become a tradition for Navigating Cyberloss.
In earlier years, I have not written about specific resolutions or steps I have taken on this journey, because I haven’t really had any. This year is slightly different, as along with the continued self-care type resolutions, I have a blueprint for where I want to be in the future with my grief journey. (Yes, I know it could turn out to be useless, but I’m going with it anyway.)
I stand by the fact that we should do the best we can to allow ourselves to be ourselves during this notoriously difficult time for grievers. There are possibly hundreds of articles on dealing with grief at a personal loss over the festive season, but there are comparatively fewer on dealing with grief over a cyberloss during the festive season.
Just as the authors of those articles write jubilantly of including departed loved ones in the seasonal celebrations, we can also include our departed online friends in these celebrations. Even if you just write a few words or a list of things that remind you of them, and choose to do at least one over the festive season to make sure that they are included, that is a great start for some form of memorial.
Making New Year’s resolutions whilst grieving can be a thorny business. Most of the time, we may not know what we intend for the next five minutes, let alone the next year. So, if you’re early out in your cyberloss journey, you may find it easier to perform some form of memorial ritual, rather than embracing the New Year’s resolution.
I’ve found it very helpful in the past to have a flexible idea of where I wanted to be in my grief journey. (Flexible became the key word after what happened in January 2011!)
In a few weeks, I will sit down and make a list of what is holding me back in my journey, and where I want to be in the future. That feels like a sound start.
What do you intend to do in terms of New Year’s resolutions in your grief journey? Please feel free to share in the comments.
Wishing you peace and strength on your journeys,