Sorry I’ve gone so long without posting here. I’ve been ridiculously busy since starting university, which is probably a good thing, because it means that I am making a bit of progress, or getting better at avoiding it. Either way, it still crops up from time to time.
After finding myself in the midst of an acute phase of missing Chris yesterday, I took it upon myself, whilst quite alone in the car, to have a conversation…as if she were still here.
I can’t describe the peace that brought to me. It was a strangely one-sided conversation, of course, but even so, it felt very, very natural. I now know exactly what Mitch Albom meant in the last few lines of ‘Tuesdays with Morrie‘ :
“You talk, I’ll listen,” he had said. I tried doing that in my head and to my happiness found that the imagined conversation felt almost natural. I looked down at my hands, saw my watch, and realised why. It was Tuesday.“
(quote from Albom’s ‘Tuesdays with Morrie’, Time Warner Paperbacks, 2003)
It’s so easy to forget that even though they’re not around physically, they’re still here. Yes, we ache for their physical presence - what we wouldn’t give to sit and speak with them again (or for the first time, in my case.) In a way, we almost can. Embrace it, use it.
Talk with them, listen close, and you might feel a response.
Best wishes to all of you in your grief journeys.